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Tag Archives: Future

Building Bridges To The Future… No Futures Ahead


Following into the new year

I sit here looking back into the face again of truth and despair

unanswered questions and hope currently not there

At almost forty my years should be settled and silent

yet still unsure what tomorrow will show my dreams unknown and my days unseen

I again feel the question coming to play of will marriage ever come find my way

Stuck inside seeing all the same walls

family neglect that will never release

handicaps which are visually unseen

a life that no one around me is able to see or believe

living in fear of what each corner will reveal

living a trap which I don’t ever see even releasing from wrapping around me

homeless and on the verge of loosing my own kids

for life which was given to me and not picked or chosen by actions I have made along my

own way

never knowing answers of what tomorrow shall bring

A  deep feeling of abandonment and ignorance from family as if I never even existed

no on looking toward the future as hope lies slim

as  I haven’t even seen a date with someone since I was twenty-one maybe at least

Not even a visit or someone to drop on in

each day my hopes dropping more slim in the sands

Will a day ever  hold a marriage ahead

I see no pathways building the bridges to the future

not even much of even a friend

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Posted by on January 2, 2015 in Love, Poetry

 

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My Future Unreal and Unseen


Tightening up my rein. I stay as tears fill my eyes.  Don’t they see that I am doing all that is fully within me. My heart may be fully loaded and have all enough to go and spread out anywhere. However my heart has been ripped and torn in many a way throughout my past out years. I am doing all I can set within me currently.  Don’t they see that this is me.

I’m not a hard out party person putting my life in behind me. This is me. This is what I live for each and everyday.

New things lay upon my plate. A man I like I have to rely on trust in truth for I can not see because he lives not near and too far away.

I believe in my heart but not too sure with my self securities.  Putting myself down and negative and hard on me is what I usually see. Yet a possitive person is really me.

Just harder on myself is where I remain weak.

I hope and pray for a true helpful lead in life that I may see the unseen which I feel shall never become a part of me. My future always seeming unreal and unseen.  A feeling as if it shall never be.

 
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Posted by on May 5, 2014 in Love, Poetry, Uncategorized

 

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Chances Of Change


Each day I live watching each passing hour wondering if this will be the year that the man that my eyes focus on in my dreams will finally come and sweep me off my feet. Running away to earths end over mountains and hills past meadowlands and through valleys leaving all dismays and my old life truly behind me.
I know the finally moving on and letting go will be the hardest things to do.
Yet if  I truly want out of this black hole of tormoil and domestic Violance and dismay then it truly needs to be today.
Otherwise my life will follow in circles under the same path traveled today
By then it may not be dismay, it may then be Just too late.
I need to leave out now yet there is looking no Chances of change
Yet being homeless is not easy or safe in anyway.
I know he is out there and that he knows the beats of my heart
However each coming year brings hope for him to come this year
Sigh but for now I’ll have to continue to face and have faith that never been married may finally become love at first sight, married before moonlight.
To then leave for a honeymoon under the sun with horseback riding and long romantic walks along the beautiful sunny beaches of sand.
Creating a life filled with many long filled memories of he and I.

 
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Posted by on January 4, 2013 in Uncategorized

 

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