The Sands Of Time

I think about my life…
Trying to understand and fins a meaning of it I just can not sense a thing
With points of anger and pain of the things which hold me back
I only wish that I could change the sands of time
My thoughts unresoluted with the times if why
My life around me falling to shatters
Even into my health itself
Spending many of my days in emergency rooms
Sitting there in the loud mouths of my mind
Watching others around me not understand and moc me like it don’t mean a thing
Saying to my face go home you do not belong here
While in my mind I know that pain and myself and only I and no-one else but just myself
But do they listen hell no back I return in a day or more immediately over same as before
Why do I live this life why did God choose me
Making me live within this sorrow and pain
I wish I could change the sands of time
The pain so intense within my chest
My breathing all the same
Short of breath and my heart racing within my chest
Yet they say you need rest dear you’ve only had panic attack
Feeling pushed off and like that is not true I rest my head laying on my bed only wishing I could change the things here within my life
I wish I could change the sands of time making a new life that would be mine
My very own that no-one knows
Erasing the titles that I have holding me against this blackboard within my life
Erasing my pain and healths in life
Making me better where my faults now linger
With things out of my control I quietly sit and ponder still trying to piece my life together still unable to understand
I sit here wishing that I could only change the sands of time and wishing they all could understand my life or feel my pain
Yet knowing that even I can’t fathom the answers of why
And in pain I sit still and cry
Wishing it all would go and leave
Just wanting to change the sands I live
Knowing that the oak. Has drawn me a cage holding me in I sit by myself to sit and cry
For every day this burden hinders me
Making others not believe
While is sit and witness they’re reactions of disbelief
I wish I could change the sands of time within my life
Then I think I only would understand
Maybe even they as well would see my pain and this life I was given to form my sands of time
I wish I could change my sands of time

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